Start Sexcaht say

Sexcaht say

“The presumption is that the partner knew at some level what was going on and was ‘enabling’ it, which is frankly an insult.

Second, the partner has to feel stable again, as well as understanding the addiction and working out what they want the relationship to look like in the future.

Bear with me means that you are asking someone to be patient as you do or explain something that might be tedious to an outside observer.

Bare with me means you are asking someone to take their clothes off at the same time as you take yours off.

Indeed, you can find a whole load of stuff you don’t desire, but get hooked nonetheless,” she says.

Traditionally, most partners of sex addicts have been treated as co-dependents, says Hall.

Like most partners, she initially didn’t buy into the concept of sex addiction (“it sounded like a pretty weak excuse for an affair”) and even when she did start to believe that her husband’s behaviour was compulsive, her friends didn’t (“they’d look at me in despair, asking since when had sexual desire became a monster that can’t be controlled”), leaving her feeling isolated.

To be fair on Rachel’s friends, there is some debate about whether the term sex addiction is scientifically accurate, but the field of addiction is changing fast and emphasis is shifting from the substance to the psychological symptoms of addiction.

The NHS has a website page dedicated to sex addiction.